I want to make you smile as you made me

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I want to make you smile as you made me
I wish to see your thoughts through your eyes
My soul awaits your sweet commands
Why let silent take your mind?

I want to make you smile as you made me
I wish to dive into your secret world
The mountain echoes your emptiness
Why let loneliness fill your heart?

I want to make you smile as you made me
I wish to be your personal angel
My wings extend to reach your hands
Why let fear cold your feet?

By Angel Pang on March 19, 2008

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Our Grandma

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In the morning
We eat and rush out for school
She does the dishes and tidy up the bedrooms
She is off to the market with a basket almost as tall as her tiny body

At the market
She is the sunshine
She is a great negotiator
She is always welcomed

Day in and day out
We enjoy her care for granted
She works hard with joyful heart
She is our grandma with unconditional love as God has shown us

Mother is very ill
We gather in our dark tiny room crying
She encourages us and asks us to pray to God
She is faithful to God with her whole heart as God has promised our salvation

At her seventy-two
We move to this western world
She continues to take care of us
She is our gardener with a grass hat planting roses, fig trees, pears, tomatoes, plums…

In this western world
She loves eating
She loves planting
She loves being with us

One blue day
We are not prepared for this
She climbs up to pick figs from the tree and falls on her shoulder
She is injured with a fracture and everything starts from that

Grandma becomes very ill
We are told that Grandma has non-small cell lung cancer
She fights confidently with the disease and her spirit is high
She is brave with God’s comfort and treasure every moment God gives her

In the morning
We lose our beloved Grandma
She lives a full life and leaves us with all her love
She is a great mother, wonderful grandmother, caring great grandmother, honest friend …

During the days without Grandma
We will always love you
We will remember your teaching
We will see you in heaven

by Angel Pang on June 22, 2011

In loving memory of the most wonderful grandma in the world who passed away on June 2, 2011 at age 93.

Everyone needs a Detox Program

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I started working from home since May. We don’t have kids and my husband is mostly working in the kitchen where I try to avoid anyway. My day becomes longer as I don’t need to drive, worry about what to wear, what am I going to bring or eat for lunch etc. So my daily routine becomes: shower, change (yes, I still get change :)), boot up my machine, make my espresso, look at my calendar, write down my goal for the day (yes, my solo scrum meeting)…boomed, it is dinner time. Yes, I sometimes forget about lunch!

Facebook, I am trying to work. - author unknown.

I am addicted !!! 

I don’t seem to have enough distractions but my day goes longer and longer. Even when I am done with my work, I continue to sit in my home office to surf net.  After I turn off my computer, I will quickly grab my phone so that I can get all the alerts that sync to my Blackberry. In the middle of a fun party, I still want to check if I have any emails in between conversations with friends.  And now, on a Saturday night 12pm, I am writing this blog.  I feel shame that this blog is so empty and I am afraid that I wasted the effort to create this blog and link it to my domain name.  I have gone so far and I have to continue. I am addicted!

We all have ADD

In this world, we have very short span of attentions. We can’t sit in a meeting for more than an hour without a break. But at the same time we flood ourselves 24×7 with useful or garbage information through YouTube, Facebook, blogs, Twitter… and keep stimulating ourselves with 24×7 entertainment through TV, Netflix, Angry Birds etc. How can we not tired? How can we not be ADD? But yet, we are not satisfied. We still want more entertainments! More apps on your iPhone, get the latest gadgets etc.

If one day, the Internet crashes, this world will stop; we cannot work because we cannot have our “normal” distractions anymore.  We cannot get on our YouTube, Facebook, blogs, Twitter, and download songs; Angry Birds are happy now; and we cannot share what we ate for lunch!

3-Days 3-Ways Detox Program

So I suggest a 3-day 3-ways Detox Program:

Stage 1: Disconnect from all Social Networks for 3 days

Stage 2: Turn off all the electronic devices at home for 3 days

Stage 3: Be able to survive in a wild camp with absolutely no electronic devices for 3 days

Don’t live in denial!  Change is a process, not an event.

A New Start

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So I created this blog…long long time ago. Today, I decided to clean it up and give it a fresh start.

I have rushed through my life and let a lot of precious moments passed by. My beloved grandmother passed away on June 2nd, 2011. She only left us some old stories, sweet memories, and lovely images. I was so eager to find her poems, her notes, and her diaries. I tried to pick up things that are important to her. Grandma lived a very private life. Though, she never hide her love and care for her grandkids.

May this blog be a place to remember my grandma.  May my life reflects her love for me.  May I have lots of interesting stores to tell when I meet grandma again in heaven.